I think it is safe to assume if you are over the age 25 you have been in love at least once in your life. How do you know you are, how do you know it is something to hold on to, or should you let that love go? Is it true that it is better to have love and lost than to have never loved at all? These are questions that I have pondered over the last 5-10 years of my life.
The way I see it, a crush is very one-sided. One person may not even know that there is someone ‘crushing’ on them. It is very tormented here, with questions of do they maybe like me or how can I get their attention?
In Love is a bit more progressed in a relationship continuum. Both people are essentially crushing on each other. This is beautiful, everything is fresh and new. Lots of attention is paid to the little things and you are learning each other. Hopefully each is able to remember this throughout your life together as it is the key to lasting.
Trusted Love is my own term, and it is where in a relationship you have implicit trust with each other and there is nothing you would not do to help, protect or make that person happy. The key is that this is mutual, not one sided.
So how do you know if you are in-love or have trusted love? Is it important to even know?
Over the weekend I had an interesting experience that I have been processing. I was getting my tattoo fixed/covered up. Now I am not great with intense pain, I have my limits as Sir can attest. He was with me and allowed me to hold (or in his words have a death grip on his hand). I focused on his beautiful blue eyes, which I do as it brings me comfort and peace. Truth be told I could stare at them for hours if allowed.
He said at one point if you keep looking at my eyes like that you will fall in love with me, and my instantaneous response was well that happened over a decade ago, which is 1,000% accurate. It was also a reminder that I have full faith and confidence in this man, have for so many years.
There are so many friends of mine who say that they want to be in love, personally I want what I have. I value what I have. Trusted love is so much more beautiful than a crush or in love it is beyond that. That is where the beauty lives.
So how do you know?